too biographical perhaps?  

Belonging - the fact of avowing one's belonging, of putting in common - be it family, nation, tongue -spells the loss of the secret. (59)  Can such a total avowal ever really happen? Derrida here presupposes belonging to a group brings all secrets to light. I belong to my family, but they do not know my secret(s). I tried to tell my mother once, but she told me I was susceptible to women's studies -- it's easy to pretend your daughter's really straight when her partner is male.

Wait. 

I need to interrupt myself here.

How many times has this happened? I begin by criticizing what's going on in these texts only to realize that I haven't fully read them. The loss of the secret is not the same as telling secrets. Instead, the loss of a secret is about refusing to acknowledge the nothing that is always between.